Good morning guys! How is everyone today? We’re glad you dropped back in this morning.
Most of you know that Dale works with us here on the place.
Yesterday Dale came in and was telling Deb and I about his little fishing trip down the creek. I’ve about determined how to tell when Dale might be lying to you, and actually this is done fairly easily…his mouth will be open.
Anyway, when Dale is telling you a story, there’s better than a fifty-fifty chance that he’s doing just exactly that…he’s telling you a story! Down around here we call them, a story, but most everyplace else simply calls them a lie!
With that being said, I’ll go ahead and tell you about Dale’s fishing trip, at least as close to his own wording as possible. Here we go…
I went fishing last Saturday, and it was the first time I’d been in a while. I’d been out most of the morning, and I’d run out of bait. As I was pulling the anchor up, I noticed a cottonmouth sunning on a small log, right next to my boat. I noticed the snake had something hanging out of its mouth. I looked a little closer, and sure ‘nuff, it was a frog! Well, with frogs being good fish bait, I decided I’d get the snake in the boat, then relieve him of his breakfast.
With the frog in his mouth I knew I couldn’t be bitten, so I grabbed him “back of the head,” and took out the frog. Now I was wonderin’ how to place the snake back in the water without being bit. It struck me to git my liter bottle of Jack Daniels out of my first aid kit. I figured if I poured a shot in the snake’s mouth, I might be able to turn him loose safely.
When I poured that whiskey down that ole snake’s mouth, his eyes rolled back in his head and he went limp immediately. I eased him down to the water, and dropped him back in.
I started fishing once more as I now had some bait. After 30 minutes or so, I felt something nudge my foot. I looked down and that snake was back in my boat. That same dern snake was back. This time though…he had two frogs in his mouth!
Deb asked him once he’d finished telling this, “Dale, you keep liquor in the boat with you?”
To which Dale replied, “Sure do! Like I said, it was in my first aid kit.”
I told Deb that liquor is a really good antidote for snakebite, and that we always kept a bottle in our pocket when we were hunting, especially quail huntin’. The reason was since most times you’re in pine scrubs or palmettos, and this is prime habitat for rattlers.
I also told her that since we kept a bottle on us, and it was such a good antidote for snakebite, most times we kept a small snake in our other pocket as well.
Dale was telling Deb and I about a time him, Creekdog, and a couple more of buddies were spending a long weekend camping on the creek.
Well, you know how a group of guys are when they’re out camping together. Every once in a while they just might take ‘em a drink or two.
Anyway, Dale said on Saturday evening he went to town to pick up a couple things. He said he got back, canoed down to the campsite, and his buddies met him to unload their “supplies.”
He’d bought four bottles of Lord Calvert, six 12 packs of Bud, and 2 packs of hotdogs. He said they got back to their camp and Creekdog went to checking out what Dale had gone to town to pick up.
He said once Creekdog saw what he’d gotten, he looked up at Dale and asked, “Dale, what in the hell we gonna’ do with all these hotdogs?
Dale and Creekdog went to Georgia fishing. They stayed in a cabin next to a marina that rented boats by the day.
They got up the next morning, went to the marina and rented them a boat to fish out of. Dale says they found a little honey hole back up aways in a little creek that runs into the lake. He told Deb and I they just absolutely slaughtered the fish that day.
Dale said before they left to head back to the marina, he told Creekdog to be sure and mark the spot so they’d be able to find it the next morning, and Creekdog said okay.
Well the next morning, Dale said they were walking down to the marina to rent a boat and head back out fishing. He asked Creekdog if he’d marked the spot where they were fishing yesterday, and Creekdog said that yes he had…he’d put an X in the bottom of the boat.
Dale told us he couldn’t believe what Creekdog had told him, and said he got all over Creekdog for doing something so stupid! He said Creekdog, for the life of him couldn’t understand what he’d done so wrong?
Dale said he told him, “I can’t believe you’re that stupid, Creekdog! What in the world are we gonna do if they give us a different boat today?”
Dale and Creekdog are serious when it comes to their deer hunting. Dale was telling us they had been seeing this “monster buck” a couple miles down the creek, but couldn’t ever get close enough for a shot.
Dale was looking through a Cabela’s magazine and saw a female deer, or doe costume. At that point he said, a light went on, and he ordered the suit.
Well, it just so happened that the dern thing was too big for either one of em, so they decided they’d both get in it.
They went down the creek to where they knew the old buck had been hanging out. They got out, and put on the doe suit, Dale in front, and Creekdog in the rear of the suit…
Dale then told us that for the last week or so after Creekdog learned that Dale had ordered the suit, he’d been practicing up on a deer mating call. Dale said he’d actually gotten very good at it, and they really believed they had a shot at fooling this ole’ buck, and shooting him.
Well, Dale said they hadn’t been there standing in that suit more than 10 minutes, with Creekdog just a gruntin this deer love call, and the bushes behind ‘em went to moving around.
Creekdog whispered to Dale that the big ole’ buck was coming up right behind him, and to unzip the suit and go ahead and shoot him. Dale told us that the dern zipper on the suit had stuck and he couldn’t get it to unzip.
The whole time Creekdog was just a telling Dale to hurry up, the ole buck had gotten up real close to them now, and was right behind them.
Dale said finally he told Creekdog quite plainly that the zipper was stuck, and there was no way for him to get out and shoot the deer.
Creekdog then hollered, “Well what are we gonna do now??”
Dale said he told Creekdog, “I’m gonna put my head down and start nibbling grass, but you better brace yourself!”
Lastly, Dale was telling Deb and I about the time he was coming up from the creek with a bucket of fish, way, way over the limit, and a game warden pulled up and asked if he had a license to catch all those fish?
Dale said he told him that he didn’t catch these fish, they were in fact his pet fish.
The warden looked at Dale and said, “Pet fish?”
Dale said, “Yes, sir. I bring these fish down to the creek every night and turn ‘em out for a while and let em swim around some. Their tank at the house isn’t very big, so they really enjoy coming down here to swim around for a while, and the next morning I come down, whistle, then they hop back in the bucket, and we go back up to the house.”
The game warden doesn’t believe a word Dale’s telling him, so Dale asks if he’d like to go down to the creek and see them do this? The warden says he’d love to see it, so off to the creek they go.
So, they walk down to the creek and Dale turns the fish into the creek. The game warden stands there several minutes and then finally says, “Well?”
Dale said he looked at the warden and said, “Well, what?”
The warden then asks, “Well, when are you gonna call ‘em back?”
Dale asks, “Call who back?”
The warden says, “The fish.”
Dale then said, “What fish,” and started walking off!
We hope you guys enjoyed these little tales this morning, and hope you all have a great day today!
Thanks for coming back by, and God Bless. As Deb likes to say, “Keep a smile on your face, and one in your heart!”
Dub and Deb