A Christmas Cake, Hot Damn Punch, and High Dollar Mountain Margarita’s!!

We’ll be putting up today a few of our more “unusual recipes…”

First off, it’s the time of the year for family gatherins, and many just might like “to partake” in a little nip from time to time. Now myself, I usually don’t do this at’tall unless it’s a “special occasion,” like for example…the sun comes up, OR if it goes down! LOL!

The first recipe today comes from a reader, Texas Gal. She sent us this via e-mail, and we sure appreciate her doing so! I’m thinkin pretty hard about goin on and mixin one of these baby’s up just as soon as we finish up here this morning! LOL, and thanks for the laugh Texas Gal!!

Our last two drink recipes come from the cookbook, “White Trash Gatherings,” and was written by, Kendra Bailey Morris. It was published by, Ten Speed Press. It’s a hoot to read, and has many tips, and some good “down home” cookin! Check it out.

Christmas Cake:

Once again this year, I’ve had requests for my yummy Holiday Tequila Fruitcake recipe so here goes… But please try to keep a copy as I am beginning to tire of retyping it every year!

  • 1 cup of water
  • 1 tsp. baking soda
  • 1 cup of sugar
  • 1 tsp. salt
  • 1 cup of brown sugar
  • Some Lemon juice
  • 4 large eggs
  • Some Nuts
  • 1 bottle tequila (preferably Jose Cuervo Gold, or better yet, Hornitos)
  • 2 cups of dried fruit

Sample the tequila first to check the quality.

Take a large bowl and check the tequila again to be sure it is of the highest quality…it is best to pour one-level cup and drink. Repeat.

Turn on the electric mixer. Beat one cup of butter in a large fluffy bowl. Add one cup of sugar. Beat again. At this point it’s best to make sure the tequila is still OK. Try another cup, just in case.

Turn off the mixerer thingy. Break 2 leggs and add to the bowl and chuck in the cup of fried druit. Pick the frigging druit up off floor. Mix on the turner.

If the fried druit gets stuck in the bleaterers just pry it loose with a drewscriver. Sample the tequila again to check for tonsisticity.

Next, sift two cups of salt or whatever is left. Check the tequila. Now crack the lemon juice and strain your nuts. Add one table. Add a spoon of sugar or whatever you can find.

Greash the oven. Turn the cake tin 360 degrees and try not to fall over. Don’t forget to beat off the turner. Finally, throw the bowl through the window, finish the tequila and wipe the counter with the cat. Nobody likes fruitcake anyway……CHERRY MISTMAS!

Hot Damn Punch:

According to the author, this is the type of warm drink that after your first big pull off it, you’ll wanna slap your knee and holler out, “Hot Damn!!”

  • 2-1/4 cups pineapple juice
  • 2 cups cranberry juice
  • ½ cup brown sugar
  • 1-3/4 cups water
  • 1 teaspoon allspice
  • 1 teaspoon whole cloves
  • 3 cinnamon sticks, plus extra for garnish
  • 1 cup (or more) vodka
  • ½ cup cinnamon liquor (optional)

Percolate all your ingredients together in a crockpot until you can REALLY taste the spices in your cocktail. Serve in mugs with a cinnamon stick for garnish.

High Dollar Mountain Margarita’s:

This recipe, according to the author once again, suggests that this is about as fancy as it gets in regards to boozy drinks when it comes to “White trash Gatherings.”

  • 4 ounces Jose Cuervo Especial tequila
  • 2 ounces Grand Marnier
  • 4 ounces frozen limeade (1/3 of a 12 oz. can)
  • 4 to 6 ounces of water
  • Juice of ½ fresh lime, plus lime slices for garnish
  • Ice cubes
  • Margarita salt

Get out your fancy tequila, Grand Marnier, limeade, water, and lime juice. Mix it all in a wide-mouth quart jar. Add enough ice cubes to almost fill it, and stick the jar in the fridge until it’s nice and chilled up.

Now, get out 4 margarita glasses and coat the rims in salt. Fill each glass with your chilled margarita mix, adding more ice cubes if you think you need it. Garnish your glasses with a lime slice.

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