Ace bandages, and Things Ain’t Lookin’ To Good For Josh

Hello again! How is everybody this morning? I’d like to welcome you back to Ridin Out the Recession in Miz Judi’s Kitchen!

I see Deb’s told you a couple tales of our son, “Red’s,” growin’ up days! Man, I don’t know how much longer we could’ve taken that young’un! I know she’s told you guys before, but I swear that child wrote the book on “Premature Parental Graying, and Redistributing Your Parents Wealth Via Emergency Rescue Services!” Dennis the Menace looked like Mother Teresa next to Red!

Since she’s told you about his infatuation of cruising up and down the country side, while paramedics hover over him checking his vital signs, I’m assuming just to “test out their equipment,” all on my dime of course, I see no reason of changing the subject matter at this point!

Let’s go even further back into Red’s seemingly infatuation of let’s scare ‘em to death, and see if I cain’t get outta’ having to do something!

Ace bandages, and Things Ain’t Lookin’ To Good For Josh:

When Red, was in first grade, I’d twisted my wrist, sprung it or something, all I really know is the dern thing hurt! Deb picked up an Ace bandage at the time to see if it’d help.

You have to understand back then times were REALLY tough! We’d just started our exhaust cleaning business, and while I was getting it up and running we were living only on Deb’s check from work. It wasn’t much, but it did get us by….

We didn’t have an insurance plan, so to make the whole family understand how serious not having health insurance was, I told them we were on the “Black and Decker Plan!”

Of course they wanted to know what that was. I then explained the “Black and Decker Plan,” went something like this. Josh, Mark, let’s say you guys are out riding your bikes. One of you has a wreck, and breaks your leg. We take you out to the barn, grab a skill-saw and whack that sucker off!

Our whole family, after hearing the type of plan it looked like we were going to be on for a while, suddenly became very, very careful! That’s the truth!

Now Red was paying close attention as I was wrapping that Ace bandage around my wrist. He also was asking the usual questions a child will ask, why you doing that, what happened, why will that help, so on and so on.

Well one afternoon, my wrist had healed, and I noticed Red up on the couch right by himself, off in his own little world…with that Ace bandage! I knew immediately where this was going, as only those who knew Red could possibly know how his mind worked.

I told him, “Boy, you better not take that dern bandage to school and use that to try and get outta’ your school work! Well, he assured me he wouldn’t, but somehow I really wasn’t buying it. Now Josh, if he’d a told me that, I wouldn’t have thought anymore about it. But that wasn’t Josh!

Just a few days later, Deb gets a note from Red’s first grade teacher, informing her that even though she understood Mark had injured his wrist, he was somehow going to have to start making up his schoolwork! He was just getting too far behind.

Well Deb handled the problem, and once again Red was punished. Problem resolved, right…wrong!

About three weeks later Deb’s sister Chris came by with a story she couldn’t hardly tell she was laughing so hard!

Deb and Chris swapped picking the kids up from school each day. They rode the bus in the mornings but were picked up in the afternoon, by Deb or Chris. Chris had two in school, Tammy and Tony, and of course Josh and Red.

Well, Chris was telling Deb that she’d picked up Tammy first, she was in middle school, then went by the elementary school to get the other three. Chris said she was out front waiting and the boys started drifting out, one by one.

By this time, Tammy, Tony and Josh were in the car, but no Red. She waited and waited and still no Red.

Finally a School Rep came out and asked if Mark was riding home with them, and Chris replied that yes, as a matter of fact, he was. The Rep then explained that Mark was still with his teacher and they’d be out in just another minute or two. Chris then asked if something was wrong? You see Chris being Red’s Aunt, knew Red too!

The Rep then explained that no, nothing was wrong, but Red (Mark), had been really going through a tough, tough time in regards to his brother’s sickness! I’m here to tell all ya’ll out there, that this is a true story, shoot, everyone we tell on Red’s true! How could anyone possibly make this stuff up??

So Chris then asked, what was she talking about, his brother’s sickness. The Rep then said that she didn’t know if Chris was aware of it or not, but Mark’s brother was dying of cancer, and it was tearing little Mark apart!

Chris said she hollered, “What? That boy doesn’t have but one brother, and that’s him sitting there in the backseat! Look at him, he’s a picture of health! There ain’t no, deathly ill brother!”

Chris said that Rep looked like she’d been “gut-shot!” Said she took off back in the school and was back out, in just a minute, Red right behind her, eyes big as saucers, just knowing…he was caught again!

Well, I’m sure all reading today know the end result of Red’s escapades…one more time! I have never figured out to this day what made that youngun pull some of the things he pulled! He tells me too, that he has no idea what made him do things such as this, either.

Not to fret though. If you guys read Shelby Lynn and Nana, link, you’ll see that Red’s daughter spent the night Saturday with her Nana and Poppa. When Red came Sunday to pick her up…she came out of our house bandaged from head to toe. I just figured Deb and I would help ole’ Red out a little bit! Who knows, come Monday Shelby Lynn mighta’ needed a little break from school! Also, over the weekend, I taught her how to dial 911 and get the ambulance to her house. Good luck Red…and you’re welcome!

But I tell you, Deb stayed right on top of him, and most, but not all the time, he toted him a little tail tearin’ up. To this day, he loves his Momma, and she loves him right back. He was disciplined much, much more than his brother Josh!

But meaning no slight to Josh what so ever, because his Momma loves him too, but Red and Deb just have a bond of some sort. One more example of disciplining your children is done outta’ love for the child, not anger towards the child.

Parents…please don’t let the liberal ideology in regards to this subject, disciplining your children, influence you. Their concern is not for your child! Their concern is only over their agenda…the destruction of the family unit…BEWARE!

Thank you all once more, for stopping in to see us again this morning! You guys are all greatly appreciated. We hope you enjoyed the stories, and that they put a smile on your face!

Take care, and God Bless!

Dub